Media's shaadi mania

Ladies and Gentlemen, girls ‘n’ boys,
Chuck all your work, abandon your toys;
For the great media tamasha is about to begin,
Get your popcorn and coke and quickly sit in.
Bollywood’s two biggest stars stand to be one,
And we all know how wedding’s can be so much fun.
No matter if we aren’t allowed inside,
We’ll still catch the emotion ‘n’ tell you who cried.
For as Aishwarya and Abhishek tie the knot,
For us ‘unrelated relatives’ in the media, that means a lot,
For though not invited, and we’re miffed about that,
It’s outside their houses we’ll camp – camera n sunhat.
To get you any head peeping out of a top floor window,
And the general ambience, which way the wind does go.

Hopping between the Bachchans’ two residences and Ash’s house too,
They’ve got Z grade security, so the photos will be few.
But we’ll make it up with speculations galore,
On who wore what n who rocked the dance floor.
Which film stars were invited to this marriage,
It’s all there on every edition’s very first page.

Breaking news: Ash’s mehendi has come in fresh from Rajasthan’s Sojat
News update: Rumour is - there’s a whole 15 kilos of that.
The Heliconia flowers are from Kerela’s Kochi gardens,
And Kanpur ladoos for all their family n frens.
Exclusively designed saris come all the way from Varanasi,
Exquisite Kolkatan jewellery for the lucky bride-to-be.
An Arya Samaj shaadi with 11 pundits sitting in,
And Kajara Re booming from the music system.
An elaborate 16 page gold embossed card,
It’s a wedding unrivaled, even if you try very hard.

It’s the century’s Shaadi No. 1,
And if you want to join in the fun
Switch on any news channel
And you’ll get your fill…
Can’t promise you facts, only pure guess work
No cake, only icing, that’s the perk.

Once in a while a wedding like this
Keeps the media on its toes, in case a sneeze does it miss.
But this time the media did slightly disappoint us,
Indeed they did make month-long huge fuss,
They covered every bit from food to panty hose!
But they forgot to come out with speculative photos,
Of how, when the stork visits, perhaps, maybe,
Sketches of the probable Ash-Abhishek baby!